Leadership
Have you have experienced a situation where your leadership let you down.
I am not talking about in politics or your elected official, for that sadly way too often goes without saying.
I’m referring to a situation where someone you (once) respected let you down. In a place of this individual or group of individuals who you expected a robust and responsible and ethical and law abiding response - you got nothing?! Well, there comes a time when "We the people", the simple man and women must realize the truth and act, and remind again and again the leaders of the new reality.
A CHAPTER - ON ERADICATING EVIL – ONCE AND FOR ALL
I want to share with you a story of my great grandfather.
You see my grandfather was married for many years and he couldn’t have children his wife offered him to take another women to bear a child, and he did.
When the child got older, he turned out to be an idolater, an adulterer and a murderer. At which point he was told to send the troubled son and his mother away.
My grandfather was very bothered by his wife’s request and he didn’t want to send his “son” away. What an ideal father!
Eventually my grandfather acquiesced and he sent them both away.
Eventually my grandmother and grandfather miraculously had a child, he was such a sweet boy, an intelligent boy, a G-d fearing boy and really ideal and righteous son enjoyed by them both.
THEN AND NOW
Story sound familiar?! Ofcourse it does - because it’s the story of Bereishis.
The Grandfather, my grandfather is Avraham, my grandmother is Sarah, the concubine was Hagar, her son being of course Yishmael.
And what we find here is a classic case of a troubled youth of the highest order and the inner conflict of a good loving ideal father who begins to question his fatherliness and innate humanity in sending away his son.
Did Avraham, the father not see the evil in Yishmael? Did he not see the negative effect it would have on his family? Was he naïve? Or was he somewhat liberal in his level of acceptance of his troubled son?!
Regardless of his reasoning or feelings, when his wife Sarah speaks up, he is clearly and extremely reluctant to take any action, but when G-d, the master of the universe, his new found Almighty, tells him that indeed “he should listen to her voice” he gives in and does as G-d requests - withstanding his inner voice, withstanding his “fatherliness”, withstanding his clear “super-kindness” towards his wicked son.
But why? Why would he give in? Why would he send away the child and mother?
Because, as the verse clearly states, your lineage, your family line will be descended through Isaac and not Yishmael – “Isaac, he will be you heir”.
Huh? Yishmael was his son after all!? Why Isaac?
FACING THE TRUTH
Sometimes in life, we must be cruel to be kind. We must sometiem come to means with a "displaced" love. Sending away Yishamel was sending a message to humanity and to the Jewish nation for all eternity as a whole, that good must over rule evil. And righteousness must prevail, even at the cost of the loss of your own flesh n’ blood, if that’s’ what it takes. Remember, and let us not forget, Avraham’s father Terach, the great idolater, Abraham had to abandon his father’s home and path of life as well. No mercy spared here. Separation of good from evil was nothing new to Avraham.
Even if the patriarch would eventually die, and yet in his life time enjoy the time with his wicked son, it was not about the now and here, but rather it was about life eternal. He had to abandon his fathers home – would that not suffice?! And so indeed G-d had to tell him, for his logic would not conclude the greater order of the day - that it was in fact about the future generations. And in order to guarantee a good and righteous future, you must call a spade a spade and see the evil for what it is and address it now, early on, and not to procrastinate and in fact kill “baby hitler”. For the alternative, would be indeed a disaster - for eternity. This all being in the spirit of the Talmudic sages, “Who is a wise person, one who sees the outcome”.
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I’m sorry. But the story doesn’t end there.
My grandmother and Grandfather’s son eventually got married and eventually after much challenges as well, had a son, in fact they had two sons. One was a good boy, and strangely the other was a wicked son. When my grandfather got really old and felt that it was closer to his day of passing her wanted to bless his son, the wicked son, the older son.
My grandmother overheard a conversation between my grandfather and their wicked son. She immediately summoned her good son and repeated the conversation. She couldn’t see the wicked son get the blessings so she conceived an ingenious plan to get her good son to get the blessings from Papa. The plan worked - he received the blessing. Not a moment to soon the wicked son comes in expecting the blessing from Pa, and he says, HUH?! I just gave you a blessing, realizing that he in fact had been set up and in fact has given the blessing to the good son already.
Sound familiar? Ofcourse it does. The grandfather was Issac and grandmother Rivkah, wicked son Eisav and the good son Yaakov.
His mother Rivkah, like her predecessor Sarah, could see clearly the wickedness of her son Eisav. And albeit the Father for some reason once again didn’t chose to act on the wickedness and to bless the child, none the less was once again stopped by Rivkah. No need for G-d here. For Humanity had already learned the lesson from Sarah and Avraham (and the wicked son Yishamel). No need for G-d to tell me what I already know – evil must be eradicated and good must prevail – leave to the good Jewish mother to see to it – that the job get’s done.
Rather here, the priceless lesson is passed on to Jacob. When Rivkah came to Jacob and requested he go in place of Eisav to take the blessings, he too was strangely reluctant, after some convincing from mom, he to acquiesces and listens to his mom and receives the blessings.
CASE IN POINT: SISTER SLASHES BROTHER
A man loses his wife to a rear illness. He is left to care for his 2 adult children. Both with psychological challenges. The father for the first time comes to me and opens up and tells me his story – eventually telling me that his daughter had attacked his son viciously and violently and he doesn’t know what to do. They are all mourning and grieving over the loss of their mother?!
Woe! Master of the universe. Just when you think it could get any worse?!
We spoke for a while - coming to the very difficult conclusion - that the children must be separated and seek help and guidance. How painful do you think it is for dad to do this, right after the loss of his wife?!
Sometimes painful and traumatizing things happen and when they do, sometimes the only response is to do an even more painful thing – all for the greater good.
My holy friends this just one of 5 stories of a most unfortunate nature that have come to me or to my attention this week.
TAKE AWAY: THE EISAV AND YISHMAEL OF 2015
As we say in the Passover Haggadah, “In every generation they arise to eradicate us”. Throughout history nation after nation has tried to derail the track of goodness and kindness. The track of righteousness and G-dliness and eventually, eventually after much pain, loss and suffering good prevails. But not without a battle.
There comes a juncture in all of reality where we must choose.
A juncture where we must call out and say, “Sorry buddy but not today”!
We must put the cancer the pandemic on the proverbial board - and wipe it out.
We the Jewish people are to be a light unto the world. We must stand up for right over wrong and good over evil. And even if it means we must be cruel and harsh - to be kind and to guarantee our future - so let it be. Like a cancer that must be cut out to save a life or the life of others – so let it be.
We must not ever let our hearts and minds be blinded by some false-humility or false-kindness and G-d forbid say we must ‘live and let live’ when in fact if and when we let terrorists live - we actually actively destroy the innocent. Only an insane person would say let a serial killer on the loose - or to allow a rapist go free.
HAVE WE FORGOTTEN SODOM?!
Like the people of Sodom, Abraham tried there too to defend them, only being shown by G-d that in fact there was no good left. We too must search and see is there good?! And if we find that in fact there isn’t any to be found amongst certain groups or individuals we must not be afraid or retract to eradicate the evil. Call it for what it is! Don’t be Meshugah! Don't be ignorant or a fool!
The innate first response inside to be kind is a somewhat a great instinct. A genetic instinct of the highest order, in some instances. But then there is the mind of the A-lmighty that teaches us that in fact some instincts are in fact dangerous to our own well being and to the future well being of our children and children’s children for all eternity - Can you hear me now!?
LEST WE FORGET
This morning a congregant came in to talk, Raisa, a holocaust survivor, we spoke for a while, actually I just listened, and she tells me: …”it was 1946 I was a young girl walking the streets of Ukraine and there were two tall-good-looking men walking towards me and one said, ”look, a living kike” to which the second one responded, “don’t worry we’ll get her too”.
That was 1946 – fast forward 2015 – she is still around… in my office! praying at Chabad! and enjoying life in NY!
The people of yesterdays generation fought and struggled to guarantee our generation, both phsycially and spiritually, whether it was the underground, the partisans, those that spoke up and those that protested, or whether it was those that put their lives on the line with self sacrifice to keep on studying Torah and performing mitzvoth or on the front line physically defending the Jewish people and the great real democracies of the free world.
The question is will we guarantee our future generation?! Keeping in sync with Bereshis 18,18: (2 x's life) G-d blessed us to be a great and powerful nation...So that our grandchildren and great grandchildren could tell of the tales of how WE, like Avraham and Sarah (and Yitzchok) and Rivkah and Yakov did in their generation, we too did our part in our generation.
May we all merit the day, where “there will be no more war”, “no more will lions roar”, a day when the whole world will see the goodness and G-dliness of this world”.